Entry 3: That time Aryn lacked patience
A week ago I completed all of my requirements for surgery. The next step includes the surgical team reviewing my case and then it goes back to my insurance for final approval.
I'm having a REALLY hard time waiting. I'm so ready to be in the right direction with my health. I'm so ready to feel like "me" again. I've tortured myself by looking at pictures of me before my back injury....and then I saw a candid shot of me at a school event today and I almost cried because that's not the girl in my head and heart. I made this reverse before/after photo...it hurts to see it now, but I hope 18 months from now I will feel proud of myself again. The girl in the before pic was convinced she was "fat" too, I wish I were wiser then. The girl in the before picture had no idea what chronic pain was. She had no idea she was a month away from her back injury. It all makes me sad.
I'm having a REALLY hard time waiting. I'm so ready to be in the right direction with my health. I'm so ready to feel like "me" again. I've tortured myself by looking at pictures of me before my back injury....and then I saw a candid shot of me at a school event today and I almost cried because that's not the girl in my head and heart. I made this reverse before/after photo...it hurts to see it now, but I hope 18 months from now I will feel proud of myself again. The girl in the before pic was convinced she was "fat" too, I wish I were wiser then. The girl in the before picture had no idea what chronic pain was. She had no idea she was a month away from her back injury. It all makes me sad.
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