Aryn Gets Sleeved

A week ago I completed all of my requirements for surgery.  The next step includes the surgical team reviewing my case and then it goes back to my insurance for final approval. I'm having a REALLY hard time waiting.  I'm so ready to be in the right direction with my health.  I'm so ready to feel like "me" again.  I've tortured myself by looking at pictures of me before my back injury....and then I saw a candid shot of me at a school event today and I almost cried because that's not the girl in my head and heart.   I made this reverse before/after photo...it hurts to see it now, but I hope 18 months from now I will feel proud of myself again.   The girl in the before pic was convinced she was "fat" too,  I wish I were wiser then.  The girl in the before picture had no idea what chronic pain was.  She had no idea she was a month away from her back injury.  It all makes me sad.

This morning was my first time attending the support group that Unity Point puts on that is "free" (i.e. paid with through program fees).  It is a requirement that you go to at least one group meeting prior to surgery and it is available to you for life (as are the nutritionists and exercise physiologists).   I sat in the back row with other newcomers.  I don't do small talk well.  I can force myself to do it, I can fake it pretty good sometimes, but mostly I feel incredibly awkward and uncomfortable.  So, I took my place in the back and people-watched until the group began.  I'd say there were probably... . 100 or so people in attendance.   One of the two bariatric  surgeons presents information each time and the second half of this meeting was led by a panel of post-surgery patients, ranging from 4-months to 19-months post-op.   I was surprised to find myself inspired by the panel members....

I've started a new chapter in my life and decided to be open and transparent about it because 1). I think people are naturally curious and might wonder what's going on with me and 2).  It's always nice to journal a long journey so you can see progress and wisdom gained along the way.  I blogged throughout my spinal fusion surgery and recovery several years ago, and it helped me recover, so I'm hoping this will be a good thing as well. I decided a few months ago to pursue gastric sleeve surgery as a tool to reduce my weight and help my chronic pain. Those of you who know me, know that after I had Aubri I got into pretty good shape.  The summer after her first birthday, I herniated a disc and found out that I had degenerative disc disease.  That finding was not all that remarkable, except that I was only 30 years old and the progression of the damage to my spine was quite significant.  One of my surgeons looked at my MRI without looking at my other ...